the slack daily

How to Rock a Premiere...

 

This Saturday, February 4th at 8:30pm, How to Rock premieres on Nickelodeon!

But that’s not all…right after the premiere you get a bonus episode of How to Rock, “How to Rock a Messy Bet” written by me!

So tune in this Saturday! Check your local listings for details.

(Click to embiggen.)

Say Goodnight, Gracie.

In the late 70s, George Burns starred in Oh God and Oh God, Book II. The movies were in a constant loop on cable a summer later. My brother Jeremy and I watched them over and over (and over and over) until we could recite them from memory. One day, my mom had had enough.

It wasn't that we were spending our summer inside, planted on a scratchy wool cushions of the sofa and slurping back Pepsi Lights, but that George Burns was so much more than what we were seeing.

That evening she took us out for our favorite candy (chocolate covered raisins for me, something gummy-ike for Jer, I think) and then we crowded around the glow of the TV for the "Burns and Allen Show." During commerical breaks Mom told us about  Gracie Allen and George Burns rose through the ranks of vaudeville, then radio, then television.

It was in black and white and it looked old even on our new TV, but I remember being so awed at the fact that something that was written so long ago could still make me laugh and Gracie Allen was probably the first truly funny woman I had ever seen.   

Later that year, our 4th grade teacher at Ben Franklin School (Mrs. Keen?) taught us how to write formal letters. The assignment was to pick people you looked up to, and ask them for an autographed picture. She would take care of sending the letters off.

The year was 1982, and most kids chose to write the cast of Star Wars.

My mom told me that Gracie Allen died before I was born, so I chose to write to George Burns.

Over the next few months, letters would come back in care of Ben Franklin School. Autographed photos of Mark Hamill and Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher. And then one day, an envelope came for me.

I forgot about the letter until yesterday, when a package arrived on my doorstep from SlackMom. 

 

Dear Nina

Thank you for the nice letter. I'm just sorry I couldn't get around to answering it sooner. I'm very honored that you chose me. I thought a letter would be nicer than a picture.

It's nice to know that today, kids still look up to someone. It's a nice feeling. I had my heroes when I was young. Abe Lincoln. Thomas Jefferson. I knew Jefferson personally. That's a joke.

I'm not really that old. I'm older. Anyway, sweetie, stay happy and healthy.

Love

George Burns

 

He sent it from Hollywood Center Studios Which is not far from where I spend my days writing comedy now.

Thank you, Mr. Burns. And goodnight, Gracie.*

*Lizzie McGuire won a Gracie Allen Award for comedy in 2003. How cool is that?

Hey Nina, Can I Pick Your Brain for Free?

If you want to pick my brain for free, ask yourself these three questions:

1. Am I having sex with you?
2. Am I related to you?
3. Are we BFFs?

If you answered "yes" to any of those questions, then feel free to hit me up.  Otherwise, please ask about my rates.

Sorry, Kids.

Not true. But the font was a nice touch.

Source: Me, writer on Lizzie McG and confirmed with Stan Rogow, EP of Lizzie McG.

In Case You Missed It.

TWENTY DAYS LATER

We're twenty days into this whole 2011 project. I know! I didn't think that 2011 would last, but it seems to have caught on with the kids.

Crowdsourcing New Year's Resolutions was somewhat of a bust. Those who did participate said I should:

1. Make more corny sex jokes. I CAN MAKE IT HAPPEN.

2. Do more public speaking. I would love to. I actually LIKE speaking in public. Mostly because I'm insane, but also because I'm someone who loves to perform but it shy about doing so, so participating on panels and gving short talks feeds my insane ego.

3. Get back on BetheMarriage. This is something I've been thinking about as well. But if it comes back, I need it to be better. Different. And the brainspace that is required is being rented out for various other opportunities. But I swear, it's on the table.

4. Write more about Lizzie McGuire. Check.

And that's it. Maybe you've resolved to participate more, but it's really my fault. Emails have been pouring in by the tens asking me where I am. One of my resolutions is always is to write more, and in this case, it's been happening. Just not here.

I think a lot about the buffet of social media options, what I use and why.

Twitter I use to be a smartass and fine-tune my very rusty comedy skills (as a result, you can also now find me on WitStream!), as well as socialize with my friends.

Tumblr I use to write thoughts that are longer than Twitter and shorter than a blog post. I also use it to make posts that I want other people to share. (Like is Gwyenth Paltrow an Andy Kaufman experience in my yet-to-be- memefied What If Wednesday.)

Facebook I use to keep tabs on my friends and see if ex-friends have gotten fat. SHUT UP WE ALL DO IT.

The Slack Daily I use when I have something that's longer than a thought and a punchline.

...

So I haven't been around much, because I've been using those thoughts and punchlines (just add character + story) to my WRITINGwriting which is the stuff I'm being paid (or will eventually be paid) to do.

I'm writing more.

I've been prioritizing that over things like sunlight, food, sleep and personal hygiene.  Ripped right from the headlines of Sheila E's "Glamorous Life."

I've always wanted to be a Warren Ellis, or my new friend Chuck Wendig (I call him a friend because I think that's what you call someone with whom you discuss hobo handjobs over Skype, yes?) who churn out words (good words, at that) at an impressive rate. But one doesn't turn into Warren Ellis overnight - there's simply not enough whisky.  However, inventing the term pudding-fucking insane is a start.

So that's where I've been, and that's what I'm doing.

The point is, my darlings, I'm always somewhere. And you're always welcome to find me. (ON THE INTERNET YOU PERVS.)

 

 

SAVAGE COUNTY PREMIERES TONIGHT!

TONIGHT: Savage County premieres on MTV2 at 10CST/11EST.

DURING THE MOVIE:
Director David Harris will be LIVETWEETING the event (and sticking around for the PST/MST airing.)

Follow him: @holycowboy

AFTER THE MOVIE:
Head over to HelpUsEscape.com* and help the survivors - if there ARE any - escape  Savage County.

*To those who ask me "what's an ARG?" THIS IS AN ARG.

Mr. Peabody & his Boy WTF?

About a thousand and a half years ago, I wrote (with my then writing-partner brother) on a show called Romeo!

I am not excited. The show was called Romeo!

That's Romeo-Exclamation-Point. I'm not a fan of the mandatory use of punctuation in show titles. It's a little desperate. As in see, no, it's a really new and exciting show and you can tell people there's an exclamation point or we used that question mark because we're not sure that it's actually going to happen even though we know it already did I'm looking at you Bethenny Getting Married?(!)

Romeo! was...an experience.

Let's Talk Bizness.

1. Willya look at that? It's me being interviewed for Your Industry Insider. (Thanks to Julia for the hook-up.)

2. My job is in your hands! Tell MTV what to do!  Demand to see Savage County!

Savage County Official Trailer from Savage County on Vimeo.

(Just click on the demand link and it'll get you where you need to go.)

Amtrak Famous

One day, kid, one day they're gonna know who you are. One day they're gonna be screaming your name on the red carpet. One day your picture is gonna be in all the papers.

From Amtrak's in-train magazine, Arrive, July/August 2010 Issue.

(h/t Helen who was riding the rails and discovered this gem.)