Last night, I had the pleasure of having dinner at Jessica Gottlieb's house with another Famous But Unnamed Mommyblogger (FBUM). Lemme tell you that Jessica can roast a chicken like nobody's business. She can't open a bottle of champagne, but that's okay - that's why you invite me to dinner.
Over the course of the evening, one of FBUM's children expressed her horror at having such an embarassing mom. 'Cause her mom said "Dude!"
That's not embarassing, I told her. SlackMom calling Older SlackBrother's J's algebra teacher a dumb cunt* in front of the entire 7th grade class? That's embarassing. But you want your parents to be as embarassing as possible - then when you grow up people will invite you to parties and give you free booze ot tell your embarrassing parent stories.
So for all the kids reading this, just remember: Embarrassing now = free booze later.
Also, between the above and this, I don't know if we're ever getting an invite back.
*I didn't actually say these words in front of the kids.** I am slightly appropriate on occasion.
**However, it is a treue story. (And SlackMom was right.)