Will's discussion with our next door neighbor reminded me of a conversation I heard a few weeks ago. I was getting ready to leash up Daisy for a walk when I heard L. outside out front door. L. lives directly above us with our landlady, P. He looks like a deranged elf, tiny and compact, the sort of person who you can easily see as a toddler, all knees and elbows. Except that he's now in his 60s, and the voice that emanates from his wee frame would be one suited more to God delivering the commandments from on high (if God was a wee elf living in Los Angeles, that is.)
I hesitated, not wanting to open the door as conversations with L. are always single-spaced and single-sided, as he stands too close and talks too loud and doesn't give you a chance to respond. Even Daisy hung back, as if sensing imminent danger in the the tidal wave of vocalizations. Thankfully, our next-door neighbor cruised up to his front door. J. is 40 but looks 30, the sort of guy who'll either fix your leaky sink or punch your lights out - or both.
Hey, J. L. calls out.
Hey L.
J., your girlfriend's been around a bit.
She has.
She's quite attractive.
She is.
I mean, L. continues, I find her quite attractive.
I hear the in J's voice. Uh-huh.
What I'm trying to say is that I find myself quite attracted to her.
J. unlocks his front door but doesn't go inside.
Y'know what I'd like, J.?
What? I hear J. ask tightly.
I'd like a fanny pack. One that says "America." Or maybe "CASINO!"
The Detective Agency is a lot of things, but boring is never one of them.
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This week's BetheMarriage can be seen here.
